Poker Emotions
A good poker face is hardest for Feeling and Turbulent types to achieve. For these personalities, expressing their feelings – verbally or nonverbally – is a natural way of processing them. If this describes you, try not to be hard on yourself. There are worse things than allowing someone to see that you’re upset. Poker and Psychological Realism A poker table is a great place to work through theories of psychology. Posted May 14, 2013. If our emotions and poker acumen are balanced, there is no tilt either way. The betting behavior can be deemed rational and normal, albeit with calculated risk-taking thrown in for good measure. When a player is on tilt, their decisions are poor and the outcomes are negative.
Some people wear their emotions all over their faces. At a glance, you can tell exactly what kind of day they’re having. Others are harder to read, naturally keeping their facial expressions neutral or working to mask their feelings.
In situations where we really don’t want to show how we’re feeling, many of us can control our faces pretty well, like poker players who don’t want to give away their cards. But some of us – try as we might – just can’t do that. A good poker face can be especially hard to keep up when we’re experiencing something negative.
To explore how this might relate to personality type, we asked our readers whether they agreed with the statement, “You really can’t avoid looking upset when something bad happens to you.” A modest majority (61%) agreed overall, but there was actually quite a bit of variation when it came to two personality aspects: Nature and Identity.
Which personality types have the best poker faces, and which types are more like open books? Let’s examine the data in more detail below.
Roles
Gambling Emotions
Diplomats (69% agreeing)
Feeling types were 10 percentage points more likely than Thinking types to agree with our statement (67% vs. 57%), making the Nature personality aspect an important factor in this study. Since all Diplomats share the Feeling trait, this Role topped the results.
Diplomats and other Feeling personality types make sense of their experiences in emotional terms. When you’re constantly in tune with your emotions, it’s just natural that both positive and negative feelings are going to show on your face. Empathetic Diplomats can find it just as difficult to mask their emotions when they’re feeling someone else’s pain as they do when they’re dealing with their own.
But this might not bother Diplomats that much, at least most of the time. After all, Diplomats tend to build strong relationships based on emotional connections, transparency, and trust.
Sentinels and Explorers (62% each)
The Sentinel and Explorer Roles have a mix of Feeling and Thinking personality types, so their responses were somewhat divided. Consistent with the overall results, Sentinels and Explorers with the Feeling trait were more likely to agree with our statement.
Given their shared Observant personality trait, we tend to think of Sentinels and Explorers as more grounded and down-to-earth than Intuitive Diplomats and Analysts. It might be tempting to assume that Observant types would be better at controlling their emotions, but the data shows that the Energy personality aspect wasn’t a significant factor in this study. Neither was the Tactics (Judging-Prospecting) aspect.
Poker Game Emotions
Analysts (58%)
As Thinking personality types, Analysts agreed with our statement the least. Analysts move through the world in a logical, objective way that tends to keep them a bit distanced from their emotions. As a result, their facial expressions can sometimes be rather inscrutable (whether they’re aware of it or not), even when something bad happens.
Analysts can certainly feel upset when facing something difficult, but it’s in their nature to try to assess the situation rationally and redirect their energy into finding a solution.
Strategies
Social Engagement and Constant Improvement (75% and 73% agreeing)
The Turbulent personality trait had the greatest influence on this study: Turbulent types were 25 percentage points more likely than Assertive types to say that they can’t avoid looking upset when something bad happens to them (74% vs. 49%).
For Social Engagers and Constant Improvers, having a Turbulent Identity means that they tend to have strong emotional reactions in the moment – dynamic peaks and valleys. This is true regardless of whether they possess the Feeling or Thinking personality trait. When something bad happens, their first impulse is to respond emotionally, making it more likely that their feelings will show outwardly on their faces. And they often feel self-conscious about showing their emotions so easily.
This is especially true of the two personality types who agreed with our statement at the highest rate: Turbulent Protagonists (ENFJ-T) and Turbulent Executives (ESTJ-T) (78% each). Protagonists are known for being very optimistic, idealistic, and hopeful, so when bad things happen, it may feel like a shocking and unexpected surprise. Turbulence makes it harder for them to reconcile their upbeat personal outlook with harsh realities. It also makes them acutely aware of when their feelings are written all over their faces.
It might seem surprising to see Executives agreeing at such a high rate, since we tend to think of them as unflappable, businesslike personalities. And they are, most of the time. But Executives aren’t always great at coping with emotions. They’re also so firmly set in their beliefs about right and wrong that if something goes badly, it can shake them deeply enough that it’s no wonder they have a hard time hiding it. The stronger the Turbulence, the harder it gets.
It’s possible that Extraverted Social Engagers agreed at a slightly higher rate than Introverted Constant Improvers because they spend more time in social situations where they might not want to reveal their true feelings. But statistically, the difference between Extraverts and Introverts in this study was not significant.
People Mastery and Confident Individualism (50% and 47%)
Having an Assertive Identity tends to make People Masters and Confident Individualists more self-assured and even-tempered than their Turbulent counterparts. They’re not as easily rattled, excited, or provoked. That doesn’t mean that they’re less honest about their feelings, just that they tend to have more balanced reactions. If something bad happens, these usually steady personalities might become visibly upset when they’d prefer not to – but they won’t spend much time worrying about it or regretting it after the fact.
Assertive Architects (INTJ-A) and Assertive Logicians (INTP-A) tied as the least likely personality types to agree with our statement (35% each). These Analysts are confident, brilliant thinkers, but they’re often not as in touch with their emotions or with the social realm as they could be.
When bad things happen to them, Architects waste little time in conceiving a plan to minimize damage or distress and move forward. Logicians’ minds will also go into overdrive in search of solutions, and they may appear even more detached from reality than usual. For the most part, monitoring their facial expressions is just not high on the priority list for either type, especially if they have an Assertive Identity.
Conclusions
Our ability to broadcast our emotions on our faces is one of the unique things about human communication. Even so, there are times when we’d rather not let people see our feelings on our faces, especially when some misfortune has occurred.
A good poker face is hardest for Feeling and Turbulent types to achieve. For these personalities, expressing their feelings – verbally or nonverbally – is a natural way of processing them. If this describes you, try not to be hard on yourself. There are worse things than allowing someone to see that you’re upset.
Personalities with the Thinking and Assertive traits often take a more rational, even-keeled view of things, so they appear more outwardly composed. That’s a fine approach, as long as you’re finding ways to cope with your troubles and not allowing negative feelings to build up. Remember that it’s healthy to let your emotions out and ask for help when you need to.
What about you? How good is your poker face? Share your thoughts in the comments below.
Further Reading
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Table Of Contents
Life can present many challenges, and mental health has never been more important or prominent in the public consciousness. Processing difficult things like grief, depression and anxiety can be a struggle.
Poker players are no different, experiencing many of the same difficulties as everyone else. But does poker help or hurt a person's mental state?
Two players who have thought long and hard about the effects that poker can have on the psyche are Ben Wilinofsky and Arron Fletcher. PokerNews explored the topic by speaking to both.
Ben Wilinofsky
Ben Wilinofsky was a winning player online before triumphing in the European Poker Tour Berlin Season 7 Main Event for $1,174,143 — his first ever Hendon Mob-tracked event. Having suffered from anxiety and depression, the man known on Twitter as @NeverScaredB admits that his name on the social media site is to project fearlessness. He understands that poker comes with a degree of mental exertion that is beyond most activities in life.
'Poker stress is unnatural,' Wilinofksy says. 'Everyone I know who plays high stakes is gray in their 30s.'
Wilinofksy doesn't put that stress down to playing poker alone. For him, poker was a form of escapism. It started with his grandfather teaching him chess as a young boy, then in later years he transferred to Magic: The Gathering.
When he found poker, he rocketed to fortune and fame.
'Poker was special,' he says. 'I could sink endless hours into it, hours during which my brain was too preoccupied to spin its wheels on self-loathing and worry. Poker was something to retreat to.'
With poker, even while winning, came stress. Every life has stress in it, but Wilinofsky recognized that the tension he felt playing poker was different. Even people with stressful regular jobs, he realized, usually aren't dealing with the sort of swings a poker player experiences.
Poker Emotions
Poker is a game of highs and lows, not just in financial terms, but in the emotional sense. From the unnatural high of winning a live tournament to the low caused by losing game after game on a downswing, poker pushes people to limits they're not used to in regular life.
'I find myself in a lot of situations where I am carrying unhealthy amounts of tension, particularly in live poker, where so much of what we have to do is keep control of our emotions,' Wilinofsky says.
Some would argue this is a benefit reaped by poker players. After all, who wouldn't want better emotional control and the ability to separate one's mood from outside influences?
Wilinofsky, however, questions the effects of this kind of mental discipline and what it's doing to him and his fellow poker players. Not only mentally, but physically as well.
'I don't think that kind of suppression is healthy,' he says. 'I've also found myself deep in a live satellite, and with a chip lead on Day 2 of the WCOOP $5K event, and both times I was under an incredible amount of stress.'
Poker Emoticons
'I was shaking uncontrollably in the WCOOP. In the satellite, I was grinding my teeth and everything in my body was squeezed tight.'
Wilinofsky says he's aware of what the effects are now and how it will affect him. Still, it can be a very difficult stress to manage.
'I find, when I fall back into playing poker, I sleep poorly,' he explains. 'I'm more irritable... little things get on my nerves more.'
Such an experience isn't limited to poker. Recently, elite sports stars have come out about situations that have affected them, with Arsenal's former center back Per Mertesackertelling Der Spiegel in 2018 about a stomach ailment linked to nervous tension.
'I think the emotional swings, which lead to hormonal swings, are not something human beings are designed to sustain,' Wilinofsky says. 'Burying myself in poker as a distraction was a way to ignore the things bothering me. It maybe wasn't a healthy way to deal with those things.
'I just kicked the can down the road and let [those problems] fester and continue to hurt, like a thorn in my side. Not paying attention to the thorn feels better than paying attention to it. But it doesn't help you get it out.'
For Wilinofsky, putting off the self-loathing and worry felt better than feeling it, but it took him further away from healing the mechanisms that caused those feelings. It was only once he faced them that he learned to separate emotion from poker.
Poker Player Emotions
Arron Fletcher
One player who has found poker to provide a pillar of emotional support is Arron Fletcher.
The British player has won over half a million dollars in live tournaments, including a WSOP Circuit Main Event. Fletcher is a cash game professional most of the time. He's also an emotional person, which many infer to be a bad thing when it comes to playing the game of poker.
'I have always struggled with controlling my emotions,' Fletcher says.
It started when Fletcher was nine years old and his mother died. Fletcher turned to computer games as a distraction, using them to focus attention away from his feelings. He was raised by his father and his grandparents and had an extra special relationship with his 'nan.'
After spending eighteen months in Australia in his early twenties, he returned home to devastation.
'I lost the closest person to me,' he recounts. 'My nan unexpectedly died. This was the most emotionally testing time of my life. I struggled to get out of bed, not leaving my house for weeks.'
Feeling unstable, struggling with grief and with limited work choices, Fletcher decided to invest all of his time in playing poker, studying and playing the game as much as he could.
'I would absolutely discourage anyone from attempting this,' he says. 'Poker is psychologically tough. My entitlement was at an all-time high and I was extremely emotionally fragile. I was unable to deal with disappointments and bad beats as well as you need to.'
'Despite this, I was obsessed and spent all of my time playing.'
Tilt was a huge problem for Fletcher. Emotions were an issue. Fletcher knew he needed to change from using poker as merely a distraction. He was aware that he was playing to keep occupied rather than dealing with the problem.
Eventually, Fletcher met a man who would turn out to become a lifelong friend: Frank Bastow, a business owner, recreational player, and passionate positivity advocate. He's also a self-help book author of Don't Be A Cant: A Manual for Happiness.
'He kindly took the time to show me what I could do with a better mentality, what was holding me back, and what I could do to improve my situation,' Fletcher says. 'I met him at a crucial time in my life.'
Fletcher felt armed with new information and was using it to improve everything.
'I started to reduce negative emotion and became calm, rational and methodical in my approach,' he says. 'I stopped using poker as something to distract me from the pain of the loss of my mother and grandmother and started to play as an occupation.'
Fletcher later began coaching and hypnotherapy with legendary therapist Elliot Roe. He credits him with a huge amount of assistance, and he's even turning around and trying to help others apply those same principles.
'[Roe] has helped me tremendously,' Fletcher says. 'This is the first time in my life I would face my emotional problems instead of distracting myself. Now I take time to coach and invest in other people, particularly in the mental game aspect of poker, which I struggled with for many years.'
Being able to strip down the emotion from his game play helped Fletcher achieve peace with his past, and he learned a lot in life while spending time at the felt. For Wilinofsky, poker was an outlet that exacerbated some of his worst tendencies, something he had to overcome in order to keep having success.
Both men became their better selves in some part thanks to the changes poker made to their lives. In a world where escapism is part of aspiration, poker continues to offer some people who have issues away from the table tools to work through them on and off the felt, thereby helping them become healthier versions of themselves in the process.
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cash game strategytournament strategyBen WilinofskyArron Fletchermental gamepsychologytiltRelated Players
Ben WilinofskyArron Fletcher